A Continual Returning…

Chapter Twelve - Behind the Calm

A Continual Returning

Every step we take is a choice. Every moment we choose to be present or not. We choose our emotions in the moment, our reaction or our response, our integrity.

We can wear so many hats and move through ever-changing moments that can feel like a whirlwind of ups and downs. I can get so full with life, with what’s happening in my personal world, in my mind, and in what I bring into the world through my offerings. Behind the scenes of what you see, there is so much effort and willpower to show up and remain dedicated to the dream of serving, and to stay in the integrity of the true self.

This week, a few people have commented on my life and asked, “Do you ever get angry, upset, mad?” “Do you have arguments?” “How do you stay so calm all the time?”

And to be honest, I’m not sure what I’m putting out that makes people think this of my life… but the answer is yes, I do. I believe deeply in clear communication when these moments arise, but that’s a story for another chapter.

Yes, I can find a lot of stillness, and I do feel I am more at ease in places of high pressure, but I wouldn’t say it is always calm. Part of this has come from learning to cope in constant fight-or-flight situations, from so much internal and external pressure. I learned to function or be swallowed by it.

This isn’t always a space where healthy coping is formed. Learning to step up or be pushed down is not a development tool I would suggest.

Although… a tool that has truly supported me in finding even the slightest stillness within myself, a place to centre, is my daily meditation practice.

For the past six years, I can put my hand on my heart and say I have not missed a single day. Sitting each morning when I wake, and each evening before I sleep, these are the bookends of my day. They create a safe container for me to process, connect, and return to myself.

My life is in no way easy. Between growing a business, being a stepmum, a partner, a friend, a creator, moving through health ups and downs, and continuing to study… it is full.

Each day, I make choices to show up for myself. To step back when needed. To be with family. To take on new opportunities. To keep creating, so the offerings can continue to flow.

Life is full.

And while it may look calm… what it truly is, is a continual returning.

A choosing to come back to centre, again and again.

How to Create a Lasting Meditation Practice at the end of this email

Healing is a personal journey that takes time, dedication, and practice.

With warmth and encouragement, Jessica Dhara
ॐ